Name that Author – Its a Dangerous Thing Going Out Your Front Door
I’ve been catching up with a number of blogs today as I temporarily pause from reconfiguring my office and writing correspondence in response to many of the people and companies that I met at the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas this week.
While casually surfing through Blog Explosion (earning a few surfing credits too) I came across a quote from one of my favorite authors (on a site with a picture theme that looks like something out of a Camelot fantasy book or something (snores).
The Quote
It’s a Dangerous Thing Going Out your front door
was featured as a caption below the title or something on this site. I recognized it for the book that it came out of right away, a book that might become a movie sometime soon now that the legal battle in the courts seems to be over.
The thing that struck me is that the quote is actually kind of obvious, but not so obvious are the quotes that could have been
Its a Dangerous Thing going out your front window
or
Its a Dangerous Thing going out your neighbors back door with your neighbor’s wife’s gold bangle caught in your hair
or
Its a Dangerous Thing repelling out your third floor bedroom window head first and holding onto a rope with one gloveless hand like a character in The Musketeer choreographed by Yin Yin himself!
That’s right, not too many people would make those connections right away!
So anyway, without Googling for it, can you name the author or the book that quote comes from? How about the character in the book responsible for the quote?
Quick Correction on Osama’s Hacked Off Member
In our former article, we mis-spelled the headline writing the word “loose” instead of “lose”.
Bin Laden did not ‘loose’ his member. He did not set it free nor expose himself, this time, although the tail of Bin Laden and the 1997 Gay Bomb strike is rather funny.
He did lose his member as in lost, gone, hacked off, look what the cat dragged out the door and lost in the wadi. We do apologize for the mix up in spelling and any visions of Osam Bin Laden terrorizing the world by exposing himself.
Worst Case of Compensation since Hitler
It can probably be argued that Bin Laden seems to enjoy one of the worst cases of small penis compensation since Hitler, hence his need to do dastardly . . . do. When you have a piece that is as small as poor Bin Laden’s little larvae, its unfortunate but no surprise that he’d have to compensate by attacking people with passenger jets just to get a chance at 72 virgins in heaven. Stupid fool doesn’t realize that the 72 virgins will laugh at his little larvae in heaven just as they already do on Earth.
Big Cucumber Bush
Thursday morning I woke up to see a very large cucumber growing in a blush. I had not slept much in the previous two days and I had driven a good part of the night and so looking at a big cucumber growing in a bush was not terribly surprising. I knew that I wasn’t dreaming, I was wide awake, but I was in that accepting state of mind that sometimes accompanies me when I wake up yet still feel exhausted.
This was the first thing to my wife heard when I woke up, “that Bush is growing a big cucumber.”
Now she thought that was quite funny, however I was not trying to be funny and just came out of my mouth. In retrospect I don’t even think it was all that funny but it probably caught her in some similar state of half wakefulness where things seem funnier than they really are.
To bring reality to the situation, I would explain that there is a cucumber vine that has overgrown its way into a series of boxwood bushes and the vine has grown up and over the bushes and started to grow back down the side that runs up against the house and the window that I was looking out of.
So this cucumber vine that seems to be growing on something akin to cucumber hormone growth serum was pretty damn big and that’s probably not terribly surprising. There must be something of a soil in that location because the boxwood bushes are pretty big as well and they probably are due to be trimmed down a little bit.
This cucumber vine doesn’t exactly represent the garden of life, but it definitely is growing with gusto in an area of North Carolina where rain has been very very scarce. The drought conditions here are quite as bad as they are in Atlanta, but they are still pretty bad.
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